Tūpuna Parenting embraces traditional Māori caregiving

Following in her late mother’s footsteps, Elizabeth Emere Harte and Tūpuna Parenting are helping whānau to reclaim ancestral Māori parenting practices in the digital age. 

It was when Elizabeth Emere Harte became a mother for the first time that she came to truly understand the powerful mahi of her own pioneering mother, Helen Mountain Harte. Now she’s taking up the mantle herself, and spreading the word across the motu. 

“My mum passed away in 2019, but she’d been a lead researcher in pre-colonial Māori parenting since 2008,” explains Liz. “Her work was about how our tūpuna raised their whānau, with the belief that our pēpi are born tapu, sacred, and that they’re born with mana. It’s not something that they have to earn, it’s something they inherit. It comes down through their whakapapa from their tūpuna, ancestors, and from the atua, the spirit world. Because our pēpi hold mana, our tūpuna were very gentle and respectful with them. This was very different to the European ways of parenting at the time.” 

This kaupapa was something that made sense to Liz, but it wasn’t until her first child was born, in 2016, that the mātauranga started to deeply resonate. “I remember thinking, ‘Oh, parenting is really hard, I see what you’re talking about now.’” 

Continuing her mother’s legacy 

While Liz’s own career had seen her working in strategic roles in the tech sector for many years, when the moment came to join forces with her mother and share the kaupapa more widely, she took the chance. “I said to Mum, ‘You can bring the mātauranga, be the storyholder, and I’ll be the tech support. I’ll set up the website and get the socials going,’” says Liz. 

Almost 2 years later, the pair were focused on this mahi together when tragedy struck. “We were all set up digitally and had started telling some stories,” says Liz. “I was getting familiar with the mātauranga and learning about it in-depth, and then, unfortunately, Mum’s breast cancer kicked up another gear, and she died in May 2019.” 

Liz gave herself time to rest and grieve, and then, when she fell pregnant with her third child, she decided to use her maternity leave to pursue the path further and see where it might lead. When her child was born 2 weeks before the first Covid-19 lockdown, however, the journey took a new course. 

“I had been practising doing some online storytelling,” says Liz. “Even though Mum had always been the mātauranga, and although I didn’t necessarily feel ready, I thought, ‘Well if not me, then who? And if not now, then when?’” 

Switching on to online learning 

With the country in lockdown and online connection more important than ever, Liz began building a library of online kōrero around the kaupapa of Tūpuna Parenting.  

“We had 3 kids under 4, all at home, we were having 3 wake-ups a night, and no grandparents to help, but my husband and I said, ‘Look, it’s never going to be harder than this. So let’s just drink coffee and get through it.’” 

As it turned out, the timing was excellent for sharing online. “We actually got quite a lot of pick-up, lots of followers, comments and shares. And then I got invited to do professional development webinars for E Tipu E Rea and NZEI, because they were trying to support whānau and tamariki while they were at home.”  

From there, the interest continued to grow. “Plunket then reached out and said, ‘We’re looking for substantial professional development for our Māori health professionals and we want to do it virtually. Would you be interested in building something?’” says Liz. “They knew Mum, as she had trained some of their senior people, so I said ‘yes’ and the rest is history.”  

Since then, more than 180 professionals have been trained in Tūpuna Parenting. The course runs for 20 weeks, broken into manageable 1-2 hour slots per week, with a mixture of Zoom meetings and online learning through videos, activities and Q+As.  

“For the first 10 weeks, we’re sharing mātauranga, including whakataukī (proverbs), waiata oriori (lullabies) and our pūrākau, stories from our past, and we’re asking the kaimahi to connect it with their own whānau and whakapapa, and share their stories and experiences,” explains Liz.  

“Then for the next 10 weeks, we go over it again, but this time looking outward and thinking about strategies for how they’re going to share it with whānau and incorporate it into their mahi every day.”  

Modern science meets traditional Māori values 

MAS Foundation has also played an important role for Tūpuna Parenting, providing funding for the website to be redeveloped and enhanced from its early, original version, built by Liz. “It was so great, because it meant we were able to get a tech agency to do it to a top-notch standard so that it can host downloadable resources and videos. Now whānau and kaimahi can really engage and keep coming back for new stuff.”  

After doing the training, kaimahi report that the change in their thinking is profound. “They tell us what a fundamental shift in their knowledge and practice it is,” says Liz. “It gives them so many more tools in their kete to share with whānau, and the opportunity to reframe their Western clinical kōrero in a te ao Māori way. 

“It’s all evidence based,” continues Liz, “and it’s aligned with modern brain science, too. Our tūpuna had already worked out nurturing and appropriate child development strategies that didn’t rely on a nuclear family, and that involved the wider whānau and kāinga (village) with the view that everybody was all in to raise these kids together. Tamariki would come to large hui, even with rangatira in attendance, and the kids would listen and ask questions, and they were never dismissed. They were answered respectfully because the rangatira and the adults knew that’s how they were going to learn, by coming along and being involved and having their questions answered.”  

And while the path of Tūpuna Parenting has been different to the one Liz and Helen first set out on, Liz knows that her mum would be very happy with where they are.  

“We always thought it would be face to face with whānau, but it has ended up being virtual, primarily with professionals. Mum would be so chuffed and so proud. Using the technology [to spread the word], she’d say, ‘Oh Lizzie, it’s so you.’” 

Support from MAS Foundation 

Dr Julie Wharewera-Mika (Head of Foundation) says, “Māia Collective and Tūpuna Parenting embody the principles of Te Tikitiki a Taranga, promoting wellbeing through indigenous knowledge, equity and community-led action. Grounded in kaupapa Māori and Pasifika values, both initiatives centre te ao Māori and create culturally safe spaces to support whānau, wāhine and kaimahi. With a strong commitment to Te Tiriti o Waitangi, whanaungatanga and intergenerational wellbeing, they work together to advance meaningful and lasting positive change within communities and systems”. 

Mafi Funaki-Tahifote (Head of Foundation) adds, “We are grateful to these two wāhine toa who, through their approach, unapologetically ensure participants’ voices are empowered to surface – whether as a māmā within Māia Collective, or protecting and respecting the mana of pēpi within Tūpuna Parenting. Their approach resonates with the Foundation’s value of ‘Tika, pono me te aroha’, which embraces the Samoan proverb ‘E fofo e le alamea le alamea’ (Let the issues within a community be resolved by those in the community), recognising solutions are within communities”. 

Head to the MAS Foundation grants page to read about the organisations that benefit from their support.